Japanese culture is one of honour. This means, conversely, that it is necessarily a culture of shame for those who cannot meet these standards of honour. This is not a bad thing, however, because the power of this shame can be harnessed, and channelled into compelling prime-time television. While in Australia we are fortunate to have many things, like Neighbours, funnel-web spiders and racism, one thing we do not have is compelling prime-time television....
Dear Diary, Christ, what a fucking day! The first thing I wake up to is my personal assistant, Bertoni, telling me that I had to rush breakfast because there was a lot on today. I was like, "bitch, this is my house!" What could be so urgent anyway? It was barely 1pm! To be fair, I've been getting absolutely done up the arse in the media lately for not realising that Pope John Paul II and John Paul Jones from Led Zeppelin are in fact different...
Disclaimer: the following must be read in Bear Grylls’ accent. This is a quick reminder: In the wild, I am no stranger to clubbing. For example, clubbing baby seals so that you can survive in the Arctic by eating their nutrient rich eyeballs is something that every survivalist worth their salt has had the privilege of experiencing at one point or another. But tonight, I am going right out of my comfort zone, and am trying a kind of clubbing...
As a child I loved Disney films. Even as I grew up, I still loved Disney movies. But each year of university has eaten away at that special relationship. I have since had to fill the hole left by that special relationship with something else, like my balls, or heroin. My tertiary education has ruined Disney films for me – possibly forever. I want to start by saying that I love The Lion King, it's the best shit ever. It has everything, Fate, Good...
I was sending an innocent text the other day and I noticed an odd suggestion pop up before my eyes. I have a HTC Legend phone (LEGEND!), and I really don't like having a touch screen keypad, particularly a QWERTY one. Because my stubby Italian fingers are not ready for the future world of the touch screen, I have a tendency to just hit the area where the letter is and hope my chubby mistypes are corrected by my clever little telefono. Often...
Look, I know this topic is controversial, but just so you know, I’m not speculating that Snoop Dogg and Jesus are the same person. That’s ridiculous. All I’m doing is offering DEFINITIVE PROOF that Snoop Dogg and Jesus are the same person. Snoop Dogg thinks He has us fooled. He thinks rhyming about placing His “nuts on your tonsils” and having “bitches in the living room getting it on” is enough to throw us off His scent. But why would Snoop...
